New Orleans

The morning I left for New Orleans I was very hungover or maybe still drunk. I had shared a bottle of wine with a friend and when my roommate came home we all had another big glass. I went to bed at 2am and had to wake up at 3am so there were bad decisions coming in from all sides. Luckily I had packed already because when my roommate knocked on my door it was 3:30am and the cab had arrived. I had time to throw on some clothes and rush out the door. The flight down to New Orleans was...woozy. It was sunny and 70 when we arrived and I found myself in the midst of a wonderful weekend. I want to tell you all about it but I'm afraid it will turn into a bunch of "and then's..." and that could get boring. I'll try to keep it interesting. My problem is that I like to focus on the details and I really want to make you feel like you were there, or at least have an idea of what my weekend was like but that's hard to achieve when there is so much to tell.

Let me tell you what kind of vacationer I am. A lazy one. I'm happy enough just to be in a different place so making plans and actually venturing around aren't too important to me but that kind of defeats the purpose of traveling. Thankfully my roommate is the exact opposite so she made the plans and I either followed or made small adjustments and off we went. My main goal was to eat and get some beads on Bourbon Street and I accomplished both. I ate crawfish pies, poboys, jambalaya and gumbo and managed to get 4 strings of beads. The first was simply placed around my head by a drunk man and the following three were thrown from a balcony Mardi Gras style minus me having to show my boobs. I just asked for them. The biggest culture shock came from seeing people drinking all over the city. Just walking down the sidewalk with a beer in hand. Walking into a bar and asking for a to-go cup. It's a different world down there.

And then I saw the Mississippi River. It was massive, brown and littered with barges.
And then I went to the wedding and there was a gospel choir and it was beautiful.
And then I went to the reception and it was candlelit and they played 'Sweet Caroline' and I missed Boston, but only for a second.
And then I danced in a random restaurant with my roommate at 3 in the morning and no one seemed to mind.
And then I went to the Carousel Bar at the Hotel Monteleone where so many famous writers have visited and I felt close to them.
And then I was on the plane back to Boston looking out at the sky with it's setting sun, thinking I have never seen anything so beautiful as a sky filled with colors. A sky full of rainbows and nothing else.

I always have a hard time leaving a vacation. I spent the most money in our last hour in New Orleans because I was hoarding. Trying to take as much of New Orleans back with me. It was all just so beautiful and the family I met who used to be strangers made me feel like family. They were some of the nicest and loveliest people I have ever met.

As my roommate and I left Logan airport and boarded the T I told her how I was always envious of those people with their luggage because it meant that they had just come back from somewhere fun. Somewhere different. She laughed at me and told me that I say such funny things. That we think so differently. But as I sat there with my luggage and memories of NOLA all I felt was sad and tired. I knew it couldn't last forever but it kind of hurts to carry around these memories and know that they are in the past now. I'm being melodramatic. I'm lucky to have been able to have gone and I can certainly return some day. I can't wait.

Now that I am back in Boston I can feel the water start to inch up around me again. That's the thing with water- it rises. Water can give and it can take away. I saw some evidence of it's power while I was in New Orleans by the water marks still seen on some of the buildings. The framed photographs slightly distorted from water damage. Walking down the street and knowing that it was once engulfed. But the water eventually lowers.

We all face disasters. Our own personal hurricanes. And we will never forgot them- even when rainbows fill the sky.

"This is an adventure"

I've started writing quotes down that I like. It's a skinny moleskin journal that I bought to write down all the books I have read but I keep forgetting to update it. There was a time where I was convinced that someday I would forget everything so I started writing down all the movies and books I had seen. It's kind of silly when I think about it. That when I am old I will be more concerned with remembering what movies I have seen rather than trying to remember what my family looks like. I don't own any photo albums. All my pictures are on my computer but I will probably forget how to use that too. I am almost anal enough to write down notes about everything but I'm lazy enough to not actually do it. It would be interesting though to actually start a book about my life. It would be like a very comprehensive autobiography but only for myself. I could include instructions, lists and memorable events for myself. I don't even think Alzheimer's runs in my family but I find myself becoming more and more forgetful everyday and I'm only 23. I would hate to forget everything.

I've been keeping up with writing quotes down though because they are interesting and they inspire me. There is nothing better than a well-crafted sentence that expresses everything you can't actually say. Or choose not to. I've been just browsing the internet and writing down interesting things or just jotting down what I read in a book. I usually do this before bed at night. I feel calm after. Then I carry around this notebook during my day so I can pull it out when I need a boost or feel alone. I can find something to relate to and feel a little better. I found this great quote by Haruki Murakami that pretty much sums me up at the moment. My best friend read a book by him and told me I should read him but I forgot about it until I came across that quote. I'm going to pick up one of his books once I get through the four that I am currently reading. I've never been someone to read multiple books at a time but there are just so many that I am interested in right now that I couldn't help it. It's not really as enjoyable though. I'm currently reading Sellevision, The Book Thief, Frankenstein and...I can't even remember the fourth one. I think I will stick to just reading Frankenstein since Halloween is coming up. I wouldn't read Frankenstein at any other time of year because it goes best with a Fall day and a Pumpkin Spice latte from Starbucks.

But this is a classic example of my poor planning. Not only do I have a ton of homework to do but I also have four books to read. Reading is supposed to be fun but I have loaded on four of them so now it feels like a chore. It's an easy fix though. Just read one. I wish I could do that with my schoolwork. I am going to New Orleans on Friday and would really prefer to have only one assignment to complete before then rather than...four. I guess four is the magic number this month. As it turns out, four is also my favorite number, but not for any particular reason. I just assigned it as my favorite number one day. I believe in assigning luck or special meaning to ordinary objects. I think it might have been my jersey number when I play basketball in middle school. I must have done really well and thought it was the number that made me good, rather than my own talent. I dropped basketball but kept the number.

I'm very excited to go to New Orleans this week. I've never been before and have actually never gone that far west yet. I've gone all the way down to Florida but have never left the east coast. I'm going to a wedding with my roommate but I have no idea who the people are who are getting married. I'm just coming along for the ride. For the adventure. I'm excited for the layovers too because they are in Kentucky on the way down and Houston on the way back. Isn't that silly? I have never been to these places though and one of my goals in life is to visit all 50 states so this will be working towards that goal. It will feel like an accomplishment even if it just consists of 45 minutes of sitting in an airport terminal. I can still observe and listen and feel what it's like to be in a different part of America for a little while. We are flying out of Boston at 5:30am on Friday and while my roommate is dreading it I am excited to be in the air when the sun is rising.

I've been living out of my suitcase for a while now since I have been traveling so often between Boston and CT this past month or so. I'm currently in CT at my parents house and kind of dreading my ride back on the train tonight. I am taking quite a late train because I never want to leave home and push it off as much as I can because Boston means stress lately. That's where school, my internship and my apartment are. That is where I am an adult with responsibilities and a rent to pay and obligations to fulfill. It's where I have four books sitting by my bed that I can't find the time to read because my mind is too full lately to even focus on the words. My brain won't stop thinking about everything else I need to do. That's why all I can handle are quotes lately. I can only take in life one sentence at a time and as much as I love these quotes and what they have to say, I can't help but want to be able to take in a whole goddamn book and not have to reread entire pages because I realize that I have been looking at the words but not really taking any of them in. I'm looking but not seeing. It's frustrating but I know it won't be like this forever. Nothing ever stays the same.

Oh and here's the Murakami quote:

"...I have this strange feeling that I'm not myself anymore. It's hard to put into words, but I guess it's like I was fast asleep, and someone came, disassembled me, and hurriedly put me back together again. That sort of feeling."

Yes. That. Perfect.